By DiMarkco Chandler:
Now we know that “What goes on in Vegas Does not Stay in Vegas” as Sin City is reportedly perturbed that its reputation as a confidential bacchanal spot has been damaged. So they took out a full-page ad in a USA TODAY newspaper on Friday criticizing those who exploited Harry by selling pictures of him naked. “For shame!” the ad shouted. “We deplore you.”
But none of the after the fact apologies will be of much help to Harry as he prepares to meet his father. Of course the Prince will not be taken to the woodshed for a “dressing down,” but that Dad wants to merely talk “father to son.” Perhaps ask Harry “What were you thinking?”
Well it just so happens, we have a Juicy preview of that historical summit scheduled to take place between Prince Charles and Prince Harry. But before we debut it for your pleasure; it’s important to understand that the English quite firmly handle sex and scandal differently than American subjects.
For when they come to their heads, there’s a certain gratification necessary before anyone is satisfied. That point must be driven home ahead of the whole ball of wax, guaranteeing a happy ending.
Thus, when it comes to reporting on one of the royals of England, it helps if sex gets in the way. Just put your fingers on the keys and you can bang away all night. For Prince Harry, clearly, an American Cell phone got in his way and now the third in line to the throne has irritated the royals enough to have them stoically asking: “What’s funny.”
What’s funny? Where do we start?
There’s Prince Harry’s Wet n’ Wild Vegas weekend, and Spare to the Heir was in Sin City for a month, not a few days.
What’s funny, you say!
What about the girl who asked, how did the dude manage to cover that much ground in the short time he was in Las Vegas?
Ooh and a royal favorite story: Harry hung by the pool—with bikini-clad babes. I could go on and on without missing a beat. Wow, “I could go on and on to the break of dawn. You see! It’s “Hard” to stop. The double-entendres appear to be endless.
It’s like the line … that classic line Prince Harry said to his billiard partner: “If I say you have a beautiful body would you hold it against me?” And of course, following the Prince’s comment, you know the line she whispered in her girlfriend’s ear: Harry’s Nut’s.
His brother, Prince William, may be Britain’s next king, but it’s Princess Diana’s flamed-haired second son, Prince Harry, who has become the spice that keeps the Royal Family juicy.
The prince was just 12 when his mother died; I couldn’t tell you if he’s gotten any bigger.
And then there’s “The Trouble with Harry;” Steve Hirsh’s Vivid Entertainment’s $10 million offer for Prince Harry to star in a feature porn film.
To keep the follies alive, Rupert Murdock, owner of “The Sun,” decided to publish images of the bare Heir to the throne seen holding on to the crown jewels.
Harry is said to be “stunned” by his sudden fall from grace as he prepares for a solemn summit with his “Frustrated” father, but I’m sure if Charles’ asked, Harry would be happy to advise his father on how to alleviate some of his frustration.
And what might the Prince say to his father? Well dad, I’ve been working hard this year to improve my Harry image and harder still one drunken night to protect the crown jewels. Father, tell me how did this thing get out of hand. I am so ill equipped that I need to be taught how the Americans do it. I just can’t get any peace Dad.
And how might Prince Charles respond: “Don’t cry because it’s over, smile because it happened.”
Or perhaps we can imagine he might sit Prince Harry down and tell him about the dirty little things he’ll be confronted with during the course or his life. Imagine if you will, that Prince Charles might respond to his son’s desire for peace with the soliloquy that follows:
Piece you say! You didn’t get any piece? “Prince Harry my son, it’s my fault for not helping you understand that in order to get peace you must have a subject and understand the meaning of your subject.
Worry not, you’re have some peace.
You see, many people have mass-debated over the ins and outs of this subject. But in the end you’ll find it firm and well-rounded. If you’re hard bent on really getting it, it will require full penetration of the subject, which requires that you take a long, hard look at the target and be a cunning linguist in order to avoid limp phrases and lack of places leaving you with a large handful of meanings. The topic can become hot by attempting to grasp it, and the more one experiments with it, the more interested they become. Also as the language changes you must rise in order to fill the newly created holes and satisfy listeners.
Since no one will help, you’ll have to satisfy this area on your own. Therefore, you yourself will have to wrap your hands around the intended meaning. In order to maximize your growth, simply start slow and eventually build up, increasing depth more and more until the recipient or subject feels the actual thrust of the point and peaks. Learning has a way of being most pleasing when no on sees it coming, often by entering the mind through the rear. Some skilled people are even able to use several quick successions, resulting in multiple solution. Then you can grasp its meaning by the ankles and focus on the point you’re pushing to reach, allowing you to penetrate the essence of the subject.
Prince Harry, It goes without saying that one needs a certain level of oral skills in order for the fluidic exchange to succeed. However, this is not enough to fill the requirements. Only through rigorous repetition of the insertion of the meaning can one fully master the uplifting effect it can have on the subject.
All of this will require the masterful manipulation of the subject’s parts, and sometimes the skillful use of body language.
Now for most people, it comes quickly. Everyone likes to have this sort of beautiful sentiment inside them. Nevertheless some claim there is abundant meaning to be found in everyday life, which nature has whipped out and stuck in, to make more interesting.
Think long and hard about the following everyday situations; you may have come across them yourself at some point.
Now you should have a good firm grasp of the subject, in order to tackle the fact that once again, it’s getting harder and harder to do properly.
This Prince Harry, will get you piece; or at least a piece.
Now rise Prince Harry; No-no, I mean get up, stop that, just stand up.
Oh, and by the way, I saw some pictures that bare a striking resemblance of you Harry. The reason I wanted to speak with you this evening, is because, if in fact you’re the bare Heir, Harry, third in line to the crown in those pictures; there seems to me to be no reason to hide the crown jewels, especially when you have a piece like the one I saw you with in those pictures to bury your jewels in. Merely bare yourself and bury the crown there; just make sure you don’t leave a deposit.
Hope you enjoyed this little play on words and please do stay in touch as they’ll be another scandal brewing in the American media soon.