Reality TV met train wreck Saturday at the iHeart Radio Fest in Vegas. Both sides, Miley Cyrus and the Kardashians, report success on the ability to create relevance from little more than shock value. This comes despite the rest of the world wanting to collectively pluck out its eyeballs at the thought of seeing one more scantily clad young woman believe fame is more important than, well, anything.
iHeartRadio is a two-day music festival celebrating music of all types. The first night featured Elton John, Katy Perry and Adam Lambert performing with Queen. Keith Urban, Muse and Robin Thicke also joined Friday’s entertainment.
Miley posed for photos with high school dropouts Kendall and Kylie as well as professional public birther Kourtney and the long suffering one who supposedly has a different father. Sorry Khloe, the world really does like you best of all, but you just keep coming back for more. Pimp momager Kris was nowhere in sight. She must have been perfecting her twerk or calculating how many millions she could make if she adopted a child to exploit.
Miley changed out of her underpants and tennis shoes after a riveting performance during which she slapped the butt of a little person and cried on cue. The iHeart Radio Fest commingling of Cyrus and Kardashians is a shock to the system. Cyrus was sandwiched between such music notables as Paul McCartney, Maroon 5, Justin Timberlake and Tim McGraw. Ain’t no way those boys thought they would ever share a stage with a naked wrecking ball rider. Musical legends John Lennon, Elvis, and Patsy Cline are reportedly rolling in their graves.
Quick change for the photo and Miley joined the reality TV sisters wearing a see through mini dress with nipple pads, a bikini bottom and a banana microphone. No, that’s not a typo, nipple pads and a banana microphone. Surprisingly, it was the Kardashian girls appearing dressed as normal humans, probably due to the absence to Kim’s rear end and lips. And no Kanye to provide ghastly selections from his spring line presented at Fashion Week. Haven’t seen it? Oh, it’s a must, especially if you haven’t laughed today. With the exception of Kourtney’s “Like A Virgin” t-shirt, if they didn’t speak, you might mistake them for normal fans at a music festival.
News reports focused on Miley’s recent breakup with Liam Hemsworth, which somehow came as a surprise to her. Give her a break. She’s only twenty. She didn’t fully realize that when you back your near naked rump into the crotch of a married man sixteen years your senior on national television, your boyfriend might not think it’s cute. Crazy, right?
She learned her lesson though. Shortly after her performance she tweeted a picture of her butt basking in the hotel pool. The question has to be asked, where is this girl’s mother? Unfortunately for the iHeart Radio Fest, the commingling of two hot messes, Miley Cyrus and Kardashian Klan, overshadowed some of the festivities. Solution? Next year, book real musicians.
Written by Linda Torkelson