Ted Cruz: “I Do Not Like the Healthcare Plan, Scum I Am”

Ted Cruz Filibuster
Ted Cruz Affordable Care Act

WASHINGTON – Ted Cruz recently took to the Senate floor engaging in what many of his colleagues, even Republican elected Congressmen, are calling an “unnecessary filibuster” against the Affordable Care Act with Cruz even drawing comparisons to people appeasing The Third Reich. During his speech, Cruz read from the Dr. Seuss classic, Green Eggs and Ham. John McCain even spoke out against the Junior Senator from Texas saying Cruz didn’t recognize that “elections have consequences.” Bill Clinton and Barack Obama have held a joint press conference singing the Affordable Care Act’s praises. Considering the fact that Cruz had read from Green Eggs and Ham, the President’s speechwriters have come out with a parody of Dr. Seuss’s book entitled, I Didn’t Like the Healthcare Plan, Scum I Am, which was mailed to Cruz’s Texas office with the intent being that the Texas Senator can read it on the floor of the Senate after people experience all of the wonderful things that go along with the healthcare bill.

Here now is that parody:

I am Scum. I am Scum.

Scum I am.

That Scum I am.

That Scum I am. I do not like

That Scum I am.

Do you like the Affordable Care Act Plan?

I do not like it, Scum I am.

I do not like the Affordable Care Act Plan.

Would you like it if your health were severe?

I would not like it if my health were severe.

I would not like it anyhow.

I do not like the Affordable Care Act Plan.

I do not like the plan, Scum I am.

Would you like it if you were confined to your house?

Would you like it to delouse?

I would not like it if I were confined to my house.

I would not like it to delouse.

I do not like it if my pain were severe.

I do not like it, I’m sincere.

I do not like the Affordable Care Act plan.

I do not like it, Scum I am.

Would you like it if it treated chickenpox?

Healthcare already eradicated smallpox.

Not if it treated chickenpox.

Even though healthcare eradicated smallpox.

I would not like it if my pain were severe.

I would not like it. Look at my sneer.

I do not like the Affordable Care Act plan.

I do not like it, Scum I am.

Would you, could you like it if you wrecked your car?

But pain. But pain.

But pain. But pain.

Could you like it if you had pain?

Let your constituents try them. Try them.

Let them try them and you may.

Scum.

If you will let me be.

I will let my constituents try them. You will see.

Say. My constituents like the Affordable Care Act plan.

I do. I like it, Scum I am.

They will like it if they have pain.

It can treat chicken pox.

It can be used to delouse.

I do so like the Affordable Care Act plan.

Thank you. Thank you,

According to my constituents, Scum I’m not.

Written By: Jon Webster

UPI

One Response to "Ted Cruz: “I Do Not Like the Healthcare Plan, Scum I Am”"

  1. Hot Tin Cat   September 28, 2013 at 9:52 pm

    The original Dr. Seuss cries out for parody, so it’s not surprising so many have tried their hand:
    http://hottincat.wordpress.com/2013/09/28/cruz-i-am-green-eggs-parody/

    Reply

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