The internet has been full of news about a North Dakota woman who will not be giving out just candy to “fat” aka obese kids this year. Instead a sort of Halloween trick or treat Punk’d will take place and the children who tip her mental weight scale will get a sweet treat, but, they will also get a note. The note will say, in essence, that the kid is overweight. If the child is young enough to not be able to read this “finger pointing” scribble, it will be the parents who are hurt or insulted. What do you call someone like that? Not even Ashton Kutcher would be that cruel. Christmas has two versions of “meanies” in the lore surrounding the illustrious Saint Nicholas holiday; Scrooge and the Grinch. Halloween never had any such animal.
In a move that would make Tiny Tim hopping mad, a “caring” Fargo, North Dakota resident is giving out Weird Al Yankovic notes to children that she deems overweight. If you don’t get the reference, Yankovic – who spent years parodying massive hits from other artists – did his version of Michael Jackson’s Bad but called it Fat. In the song, and the resultant music video, he sings, “Because I’m fat, I’m fat you know it.” In this instance the resident has gone that little bit further, she’s saying to the chubby kids, “Because you’re fat.
On top of the metaphorical, and literal, fingerpointing, that she is partnering up with her candy distribution she is being a little too judgemental of children she knows nothing about. The lady in question, a Fargo resident who only gave her name as Cheryl, says she is doing it out of concern for the amount of obese children she sees. Apparently, besides being the name of a blackly comic Coen Brothers’ film, Fargo is home to the “fat of America.” At least according to this woman.
Cheryl participated on a call-in radio show in the North Dakota city. She explained that she wanted to make folks aware that these “moderately overweight” children were “struggling” with their excess fat and needed intervention. One the bright side, this local version of a “busy body” will be handing out the notes in sealed envelopes apparently. The very fact that “Cheryl” expects these youngster to not throw these inedible pieces of paper away immediately shows a touch of naivety. She is also ignoring the curiosity level of children young enough to trick or treat.
Never mind that perhaps half of them will dump the offending junk (spelt anything not sugar-based) from their candy stash, a certain amount will probably go ahead a read the thing. At that point, the Halloween version trick or treat Punk’s will have scarred a hefty kid for life. Well done Cheryl, you have just cost one family the price of a good therapist for little Joey or Janey.
On the phone in radio show, the hosts inquired why Cheryl just did not provide a healthy alternative to processed sweets. Her response was that she did not want to be seen as a meanie who was punishing the weight challenged youngsters. Obviously it is much better to point a finger and say, in writing, that the kid is fat.
Sugar coating her intentions (pardon the pun) does not change the fact that she is poking her nose into other people’s business. According to the Houston Press, some netizens have suggested that Cheryl mind her own “f***ing business” and one blog helpfully added that toilet papering the woman’s house might be the penalty for her actions.
The radio show has promised to “follow up” the North Dakota woman’s plan the day after to see just how everything went. It could well be that Fargo report a toilet paper shortage on Friday in local shops. Apparently this “well meaning” female is dishing out a little “tough love” with her sweets. She might have been better off to not participate in Halloween at all.
Do not carve out the pumpkin. Keep the skeletons in their closets, refrain from stringing up orange and black streamers and turn off your porchlight. It would be much more acceptable to not give out anything at all than to be cruel to an overweight child who many just have a glandular condition.
The idea of a Halloween trick or treat Punk’d is as distasteful as it is disturbing. Why on earth would anyone want to potentially scar a youngster? Of course they may have irate parents show up on her doorstep instead of a sobbing child who has just been called fat. A lot of “little” children are accompanied by a parent or two. If Mom or Dad who are chaperoning can read the letter and they will know exactly who accused their young one of being obese. Going by your christian name won’t keep you anonymous “Cheryl” and it will not protect you from the wrath of a chubby tykes parents. Next year? Try handing out fruit or not answering the door. Okay?
By Michael Smith