Justin Bieber on the Prowl in Latin America

Just in fun you know

Justin Bieber

What is Justin Bieber up to now, he has the devil may care attitude outside the borders of the good old US of A, so what, you know. Well if you really think of it not much is wrong with him or his overconfident, arrogant and know it all attitude, specially when he is on tour “Believe,” you know. Bieber is supposedly a good, sane kid as long he is within the confines of America or for that matter his native Canada, but just a hundred of air miles apart or a couple of hours away and he shows off his more eerie and sinister side, you know, the excitement sometimes gets the better of you, especially at his age.

Oh! Yes, it is bad to litter the streets of America, but what’s this fuss about spray painting the walls in Bogota or Rio. These guys don’t care about their streets or even their sheets being dirty, in actual fact they wash their dirty laundry no linen, you know, all in the open and leave it there to dry. How uncouth, all those undergarments, you know, the bras and panties, enough. The mere thought makes me…, you know.

In reality they excitedly await the coming of some American idol, or some rich American, you know, to come and shower their walls with whatever he has on his mind or his pants, like updating his FaceBook status on his iPhone; and to top it get away with it as well,but don’t be too sure about that these days, you know.

As far as the women are concerned you can have them in herds there, you know, as one or two won’t suffice for a sex symbol in the making, like Bieber. But in reality only two will do, when dear JB comes to know of their $1,200 hundred per night price tag. Alas, you know, the dollar is not as powerful as it once used to be.

Apart from the polluted air, the abysmally colorless, choking atmosphere and what not besides, it is just not safe to be in Colombia, Brazil or Paraguay. They just don’t know how to behave in the presence of a celebrity, you know. They throw bottles at you as you sing, create a lot of noise and don’t leave the arena knowing full well that the show is over. Shame on them, they take your photos without your consent, especially while you are sleeping after all that hard partying, you know, for whose sake but them and then they have the audacity to call you names and in addition call the police. All that fine booze down the drain.

How can you expect someone of the class and stature of JB and the sophisticated members of his entourage drill some sense into them and teach them manners, you know, when their parents have not been able to do so.  Manners, of course, that you don’t spit on the sidewalks, make fun of someone’s cultural values and norms and mind your own business and not to peep into other people’s lives and affairs.

It is just ridiculous, how can someone so naive as JB distinguish, you know, a gentleman’s club from a prostitute’s den, especially when he doesn’t know the d**n language and these people making such hue and cry and splashing his good name in those horrid tabloids, yellow journalism, you know. Yuk! They don’t even have the common decency or the common sense, to abide by the maxim live and let live.

Well dear Bieber, you are not the first and certainly not the last member of the first world to venture into the smog ridden third world; now they even have a third gender, some one informed the scribe the other day, so writing this word makes me a wee bit embarrassed and even fearful that its usage might not be taken in the wrong sense, you know. The best way then is not to use it at all, and contend with under developed or not developed at all, so as to avoid unnecessary confusion or controversy.

Sorry, for the unnecessary digression, just a last word of caution, don’t get too cozy with these guys, especially the gals and certainly those escort types, you know. Just go on with the motions, lip sync the songs, dance a little and if you feel the urge give a live singing performance or two; collect the dough they owe you, pack your bags and leave before anything untoward happens, as if not enough has transpired already, in this last week or so. Bieber let bygones be bygones, you know.

By : Iftikhar Tariq Khanzada

Hollywood Life

The Daily Mail

New York Daily News