To everyone’s surprise, especially the executives at A&E, we learned this week the “Duck Dynasty” family is Christian. Yep, it sho’nuff is hard to believe a family living in the deep south would actually have Christian beliefs. Why they even read the Bible and pray befo’ meals and stuff. Well don’t that beat all.
Yup, those big men up there at A&E didn’t right much figure this out, or maybe they did. See we are finding out that them there Robertsons who have made themselves a right good living making duck calls believe in things like God, America and free enterprise making them real people. This latest fuss makes us wonder, not about the Robertson’s but rather about A&E. Maybe they were trying to poke fun at good ole’ boys by producing a show which would make everybody point and laugh at them there Robertson’s and the backwoods way they live. After all people don’t really live like that in the real world, y’all know the one we mean, where everyone can say what they want and do what they want as long as it is what the liberal left wants. Heck, you can have your own opinion as long as it’s the same as theirs. You know, we heard tell that A&E has even been editing out a fair portion of the Robertsons conversatin’ about God and religion, and even have intentionally bleeped out words trying to make it look like they were using cuss words when they weren’t.
Yup, it seems them folks in their big, fancy offices at A&E never would have thought the Robertsons would actually believe that homosexuality is a sin like it tells them in the Bible, and my they sure were shocked when Phil expressed his belief, and even quoted from that Bible, that it is a sin, can you believe that? Why who would ever think a back woods, self-made millionaire could even read?
It looks like A&E has gotten themselves all in a pickle now cuz they never figured people don’t watch the show because they want to make fun of these southern folk, but rather because they want their families to be like them. Why ain’t it nice to see families where the kids aren’t out doing them illegal drugs and the girls aren’t all knocked up before they is married? No, we certainly don’t want any one watching a show like that, instead we want folk to be watching things like “Crazy Hearts” or “Rodeo Girls” where half naked wimin are seducing men, yup, that’s the way it really is. So now what is they going to do?
Now since the surprise about the “Duck Dynasty” family being Christian and all, A&E has to do something, they can’t let anyone be offended out there and as everyone knows those Christians, especially those rip-roaring, bible thumping kind are very offensive. So they took action and told ole Phil he had to take a hiatus from the show, seems they don’t want daddy to be the big daddy of the family no more. Of course it hasn’t stopped Of course they couldn’t have been all that offended since they are showing replays of the show all weekend. Why, you don’t think maybe A&E are trying to make money of this whole thing do y’all?
“Duck Dynasty” is their most popular show and the most watched reality show in history and it makes A&E a heap of money but they might have done their toe counting wrong on this one. See them there Robertson’s have more money than flies on a bull’s rear at fly time, and they don’t really need to be doing the show. In fact, the rest of the Robertsons might just be telling A&E to go jump in that ole mud hole out behind the privy saying “No Phil, No Show.” Why the nerve of them high-fallutin’ folk.
So maybe this show will go away like June bugs in December just because the gay and lesbian community has made a fuss about it. It don’t mater none that the Robertson family used to live in a shack and built a business from nothing to live the real American dream, nope, it only matters that the family patriarch has told the truth about how he feels and that the “Duck Dynasty” family is Christian and somehow that is wrong.
Commentary by Paul Roy