Regarding the attraction of a woman, one poet put it so eloquently by saying, “A woman’s glance is working the will of Heaven.” That, my friend, is how most guys have grown to understand women. Since we were boys, we knew there was something alluring about the opposite sex, but for the life of us, we could never capture lightning in a bottle! Every guy remembers the awkwardness of navigating the minefield of male/female relationships. It probably started in third grade with the girl who sat across from you. The problem is now you’re in your twenties and the girl works in the office down the hall and you keep making up these dumb excuses like borrowing her stapler instead of manning up and asking her out.
If you haven’t been paying attention, the landscape of dating has evolved to the sophistication and savvy of a booming tech company. You’re either in the game or you’re either in the game or being left behind. I totally get it and I’m here for you guys!
Allow me to share some easy, yet effective, tools you can incorporate into your life immediately that will assist you in the “glance” department with the ladies. To be clear, these ARE NOT some hookup tactics to get some chick in the sack this weekend. These are merely some aesthetics you can add to enhance what you already have to offer. So let’s get started:
- A well-tailored suit: I can hear you guys bellyaching already! Who has the money for a tailored suit? Aren’t they super expensive? Look around gentlemen, we pay for what’s important to us. If you have a closet full of expensive sneakers or have a taste for fine things like wines and cigars, you have plenty to spend on a good suit. Don’t think more equals better. Think inline of what looks good on you. For the newbie, I suggest going to a decent store like Men’s Warehouse, Macy’s or Jos. A. Banks (they’re usually running great sales too). Your objective is to get a couple of pieces that can serve dual functionalities. Make sure to avoid the flashy stuff too! Tell the sales person you need a two-buttoned suit, something with a tapered fit in either a blue pinstripe, charcoal or black. These are colors you will always need. Again, the fit is crucial! Let their on-site tailor assist with the break of the pant and fit of the blazer. For the more experienced consumer, you may want to explore a fine-tailored bespoke suit. Many high-end lines such as Bobby Macc Bespoke travel worldwide for fittings. However you decide, the result will be stapled pieces that you can trick out with shirts, ties, and pocket squares. And while you’re at it, make sure to pick up a pair of black lace-up dress shoes and a pair of medium brown Oxfords as well. You will thank me later!
- A grown man’s watch: There’s a huge difference between the watches you should wear in your teens and what you wear after college. No disrespect to Jay Z, but the iced-out, bold-faced ROC-A-WEAR watches aren’t for the business/dating scene… and neither are the plastic “bubble gum machine” watches. If you have these, throw them away NOW. But let’s not jump to the other end of the spectrum and go spending a thousand bucks for a Movado. There is middle ground my friend. In most stores there’s a jewelry counter with a good selection of dress watches (think Kohl’s or even Target). You can expect to invest about $100.00 to $150.00 for a watch that will transition easily from the office to a nice night out. The objective isn’t to get a watch that attracts attention or makes you feel like a newly signed rapper. You want a tri-color watch that matches both black and browns. My favorite for a long time was a simple gold and silver finish watch I purchased from Fossil. I wore it for years. Whether going to work or hanging out, it was subtle, yet made a solid statement.
- A real bottle of cologne: Ok guys, let me be clear. AXE Body Spray is not what I’m referring to. Forget what you see in the commercials, women aren’t flocking to you when you wear that stuff. I’m talking about fragrances that really get you noticed. Here’s where you should be willing to spend a few extra bucks (you have it, just skip fast-food for a couple of weeks). One place that has never let me down is Sephora. You probably think it’s just for the ladies, but you are so wrong! Cologne isn’t something you should buy on impulse. Mainly because all perfumes are composed of a top note, a middle note and a base note that changes over time. Also, your body chemistry has a major effect on a fragrance. What smells great on your buddy may smell like crap on you. Sephora has professionals that help consumers understand the types of smells that work well with their chemistry. So take a trip there and let them hook you up. Whether spicy or floral notes work best for you, Sephora can get you straight. Don’t you dare skimp on the smell goods by going to your corner drug store…Trust me, the sacrifice is worth it!
I’m sure you can think of a million other things you need to have in order to date successfully. But here’s the deal… my job is to help you get started with the basics. Everything will begin to fall into place as you build the foundation. A good suit, nice watch, and cologne are the perfect beginning. So there you have it. If you’re ready to get serious about dating, you now know what you need.
Written by Early Jackson
(Edited by Cherese Jackson)
Book: The Modern Princess: a 21st Century Guide to Fairytale Relationships
Bobby Macc: Custom Suits
Top Image Courtesy of Early Jackson (New Direction Coaching Associates)
Inline Image Courtesy of Bobby Macc Bespoke- (www.BobbyMacc.com)
Featured Image Courtesy of Nick Gray – Flickr License