The Ego, Erectile Dysfunction and the Wrong Person


There are three words that can shatter the male ego each time you hear them.  Penis is one; and erectile dysfunction, are the other two.  When used in the same sentence, the combination of these three little words, have Herculean strength.  And if uttered by the wrong person at the right time, they’ll either paralyze or send chills up your spine; especially if they pertain to you.

For years, this embarrassing subject has been a closeted issue for many men, while for others; its mere mention is completely taboo.  Conversations on this topic, coupled with those of penis size and performance, are guarded like the Holy Grail and only spoken of in whispers, if at all.

For most men, having an appendage that is too small, too thin, too short, or having one that encompasses the trio of irregularities, is a hard pill to swallow.  And try as they may to overcome the physical challenge, once the Battle of Erection is lost in the mind, making it to the performance finish line is a far gone thing.

Physical impediments like sickness and disease may challenge men from rising to the occasion, but often, just finding the right prescription can be the panacea for the ill.  Performance anxiety, on-the-other-hand, especially when caused by a partner’s harsh negatives, can subconsciously render one helpless in the bedroom for years to come.

The insurgence of male enhancement drugs like Viagra, PowerMax, ProXtra, and others, has helped to alleviate problems of inadequacy and impotence; but they do nothing for the mind.

It’s no secret that most men unabashedly consider their penises as rods of gold, able to accomplish magnificent sexual fetes in the bedroom.  And without question, that’s wonderful!  But bedroom superpowers aren’t based on gold, silver or platinum, but the feeling that comes from knowing that whether your member is a jolly giant…or an average Joe…your partner still views you as Superman when it comes to adult-calisthenics and laying pipe.

Unfortunately, however, and especially when anger is aroused, sexual partners can demean, debase and intentionally destroy egos, and the excitement of intimate encounters.  Even if erectile dysfunction is not an issue in your relationship, blatant indiscretions concerning a partner’s inadequacies are a big No…No and lead to debilitating dysfunctions of the mind.

With male enhancement aids like penile implants and pumps, men who once felt slighted can, in most cases, comfortably rise to the occasion.  But once feelings of low self-esteem, stress, anxiety or criticism prevail, performance ability greatly diminishes; and against the power of the mind, even the best male enhancements are useless.

Being able to perform sexually depends on more than just an erection.  And unless you’re unemotionally sprinting towards the finish line again…and again…and again, pleasing is part of the pleasure.  Hearing someone say that “you’re not the lover of yesteryear” can send one into a lugubrious state for years to come.

If you’re dealing with closeted erectile dysfunction…bury the shame and get help!  If your dysfunctional problems are physical…see a doctor.  If they’re emotional…see a therapist.  If they’re because of a venomous partner…see someone else!

Enjoy the wonderful intimacies of life and just remember two words:  It…Work!


By:  DeBorah Heggs-Alston

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